Art of letting Go...

When we truly love someone, we give our best and let that person see the pureness of our intention. But sometimes that person makes us cry and hurts us for the wrong reason. That someone must have loved us but has not loved us enough to make him stand for what he truly felt. By this time you are faced with the seemingly impossible task of forgetting. We have burdened ourselves long enough but we still can't get out of this emotional trap. Let us remember that the more we try to forget someone we love, the more painful letting go will become.

Sometimes we never had to take that person out of our hearts at all, for he will always be there no matter how hard we try to drive him away. It isn't his presence that make this difficult but it is our stubbornness to accept our destiny that aligns forgetting next to impossible. We keep a cold face but deep in our hearts, there is still lingering hope for reconciliation. Somehow, we still believe that we can rekindle the small embers and relight the fire that once burned in our hearts. These thoughts give us hope but it also breeds the seeds of loneliness and despair.

The only way to forget is to accept and the only way to move is to look ahead and let the footprints of the past be blown away by the wind of time. Only then can we find the real happiness in our hearts.


-i've got this one from my couzin and this hold true for myself...

Are you for real?

I have known this person for years now. I haven't known him personally but i feel like i knew him beyond any imagination can. Do you believe in long distance love affair? I've been there once and now Im not sure if I still feel the same. I do but I think the feelings have been kept inside and nurtured through the years. I cant believe I have been this fool. Thinking someone that's not suppose to be remembered but i just cant help myself.

i Was thinking if im doing the right thing. Keeping in touch with the person im not supposed to. Talking to him like we used to talk before. Having endless conversation without thinking if that was right. maybe yes. my heart said it is, my mind contradict a part of it and my conscience doesnt want it. I have sleepless night wondering if what would I do. considering having a boyfriend, very well honest and gives me time. I have this feeling that I should treasure this man but a part of me tells that I should be fair. Fair enough to let him know about my thoughts, my feelings, my plans. Never before we had a conversation like this. I want to tell him one of those but i just. The moment i tried to open up this topic I lost my courage. I dont want to hurt him and be hurt. I know would. eventually and sooner or later. he's just a good man. I was torn between them. A man I know personally, have been together for 2 years now. have shared intimate moments and chats. shared hopes and plans for the future. I have been neglecting him once in a while. he promised me tomorrow and forever. Oh. I would love to hear that. He promised me everything and he's just everything what a woman want. I cared for him. Loved him. think of him. but when the other turns up everything changes in just a wink of an eye. I can forget everything just to have a good conversation. And Im confused right now.

I have been asking advice from a friend of what to do. Somehow i feel better now. Im afraid of the future. I dont like to move. I dont want to do the first move but they too would never. the other didn't have an idea and the other just waiting for me to decide wheter or not the choice is with him or not. How ironic! Life it is! I am just starting to feel life. To live life. To suffer what the world offered for us and what could we do in return. I have been so naive all these years to let the things happen for themselves. I haven't made a choice of my life. I know I should do But im afraid what would it turns out to be. And if it is, I dont know if it brings me happiness. Somehow, in one way or the other, I know I should better thinks fast, think quickly before I might run out of choices. Im so afraid lord God. If I would be ask, I would rather be in a place to see only what brings out to me. Not today, right now, right here, so helpless, so disturbed, havent move on.

some friends told me to meet him up. to see if he's real. to see his worth. to see the person i have been longing this days. A friend had said that dont hope for someone your not sure existed. but I know, I knew, and I really knew that he is. They have been open to me that he's not worth that much. I know my friends are already tired of my drama and they might not understand what i feel, what i know, whats bothering me. and i preferred to talk to a stranger. tell what i feel coz "somehow i wont bother if he agrees or disagrees with me. what he/she would think of me becoz he/she just a stranger and i wont bother to react about their opinions and in one way or the other, there is a person that you feel comfortable with, to share emotions."

i have been writing this praticular blog continuously and im writing it fully, without pause. Thoughts have been filling my head, Ideas to express. and I feel its not me at all or its the other part of me. I am not a writer. not even in my journal. I dont write. I suck in english. yet I have been writing like theres tomorrow. Somebody give me advice pls.

I dont want to be always like this. I want to improve. I want to grow up. Could somebody give me advice?

Broom

It's been a cold afternoon. It began raining hard but suddenly it stopped. I felt boredome. I feel like I want to go to the city and have on line. So, i got myself dress up and prepared to go. I have second thoughts of going to the internet cafe or to meet up with my man. I would like to have a dinner with him but he didnt showed up so i waited for several minutes. I was standing along Quezon Ave. near StreetShop to wait for a jeepney going to his office, suddenly, a girl bringing a brooms for sale. The girl approched me and said "Te, palit silhig te, pampalit lang nako ug isa ka notebook kundili pambalon nako ugma" (Please, can you buy a broom for me..? So I can buy a notebook for my school and for me to have a rice for a dinner..?). I was touched by the mere sight of a girl working for just a small penny. I havent got much in my pocket so i just gave the girl 5 pesos instead and said, can this help you i a little way..? and a gave it to her. I cant say if I am being selfish or what.. My heart aches. I just went to the church instead and prayed for the girl to have her brooms sold and may they have a nice dinner to tonight. hahaiii...